5 of Cups

Keywords & phrases

• Loss
• Sadness
• Grief
• Loneliness, isolation
• Regret
• Guilt
• Shame
• Denial
• Repressed emotions

First impressions

This card speaks clearly of loss and loneliness, sadness and disappointment.

What is happening in the card?

Here we see someone, cloaked in black, with their back turned to us, standing at the edge of a fast-flowing river. In the background, there is a bridge crossing the river with signs of life and civilisation on the other side – a town or castle.

In the foreground, we see 5 cups. To the left, 3 have been knocked over, their contents apparently lost to the ground. The 2 remaining cups on the right stand upright, untouched. 

The character in this card does not show their face. They seem focused on the 3 lost cups, rather than the 2 that are intact – on upset of the past rather than the potential in the future. Their whole stance and demeanour suggests utter dejection and regret.

Or is it guilt and shame?

How can we relate to this card?

As with all the 5s of the Tarot, the 5 of Cups brings struggle. This time it is an emotional challenge.

It is the experience of loss and disappointment. A new wound or the reopening of an old one. Something we all must go through at some point. When we feel cut off, or choose to cut ourselves off, from the rest of the world and focus on our misfortune.

For some, the message of 5 of Cups is as simple as ‘it’s no good crying over spilt milk” but, with the astrological aspect of Mars in Scorpio, the suggestion is that the disappointment runs deep. So, for others this card will speak of terrible loss and grief and should not be trivialised.

The 2 upright cups remain and the bridge back to ourselves stays open for when we are ready to cross it.

Message & affirmations

Today, I honour my past pain and emotions and I forgive myself and I forgive others. In doing so I release myself from the past and I am free to move forward and to live and love with an open heart. 

My personal experiences of this card

Crying over the loss of how I thought things would be. Regret and denial about my part in my own disappointments.

This for me is the shame and regret I have felt over the loss of success and pride in life, love and work – the failure of relationships and the dreams and aspirations that have been broken over time. This is facing up to all of that and moving beyond it to focus on the present and, of course, the future. All is not lost.

Stepping onto the bridge and returning to hope and love.

Events, situations & readings

In a relationship spread:
The level of loss and disappointment that this card represents is very personal. This card speaks for itself directly to the seeker of the loss that they have experienced. The posture and the message that it conveys is universal. 

The 5 of Cups asks us to find a way to return to the world after we have faced loss and disappointment… though we may carry the loss, may be changed by it, forever.

In a work/career/finances spread:
A time to cut your losses or perhaps just to take stock, learn from past mistakes and move forward.

In a personal/spiritual development spread:
A loss of faith… finding your way back.

People & interaction with other cards

When this card comes with ‘positive’ cards such as The Star and Ace of Cups, it encourages us to look up and ahead to face the future with hope. And Temperance would add patience – with ourselves, with others and with the process of loss and disappointment.

This card does not ask us to forget what we have lost, or the mistakes that we have made, but offers hope that we can move forward, live with it, and live with purpose and connection. 

If The Hierophant, the arcanum associated with the 5s in Tarot, is also present in the spread it could encourage you to turn to a trusted teacher, mentor or advisor – or your faith – to help you manage your feelings around loss and disappointment. To have faith in the future.

With some of the more challenging cards of the Major Arcana, like The Devil, Death and Judgement, the 5 of Cups requires us to face our demons and to let go of the past and move forward. This process can be transformative.

Questions, prompts & insights

What pain are you holding on to?

Who do you need to forgive? Can you forgive yourself?

What or who can you focus on in the here and now to help you reconnect with your present and your hopes for the future?

What is there to learn from past disappointment? How might you adjust future expectations?

Featured decks:
Main image from The Rider Waite Tarot.